Men don’t always feel comfortable reaching out or opening up about life’s challenges. Some worry they’ll burden others, while others simply don’t know how to start the conversation.

If someone you care about seems to be having a tough time, they may want to talk but struggle to do so. Taking the first step and reaching out can make a real difference.

Preparing for a tough conversation

You can’t fix someone else’s problems—but you can be there for them. Often, listening is the most helpful thing you can offer. Asking someone how they’re doing won’t make things worse. Taking a moment to prepare yourself can help the conversation feel safer and more supportive.

Check in with yourself.

Ask yourself:

• Are you in the right headspace?
• Do you have the time and energy to listen?
• Are you okay if they’re not ready to talk, or don’t want to talk to you?
• Are you prepared if their answer is “not great”?

You don’t need to be a counsellor or have all the answers. Just be yourself.

Choose the right time

Important conversations can happen anywhere, but with physical distancing limiting our options, planning ahead can help.

Arrange a time for a video call so you can talk face to face, even if it’s virtual. For some people, starting the conversation with a text or message feels easier—and that’s okay too.

Understanding Why Support Matters

Men often face social pressure not to express vulnerability. Many are uncomfortable talking about their emotions or asking for help — sometimes because they fear it makes them look weak, even when they’re struggling deeply inside.

Real support helps build trust, reduces isolation, fosters resilience, and can be a lifeline when someone feels overwhelmed.

Helping Without Overstepping

• Don’t pressure someone to talk if they’re not ready — offer other options like writing, activities, or professional help.

• Look for changes in behaviour, mood, or routine — these can be early signs someone needs support.

When It’s More Serious

If the person is in immediate danger or threatening self-harm, contact emergency services (999 in the UK) or a crisis line right away. Even supportive friends need help from professionals in critical moments.

Ways to Give Practical Support

1. Be Present & Listen

• Ask open-ended questions like “How are you feeling today?” or “Do you want to talk about what’s been on your mind?”

• Let them speak without interrupting or judging.

• You don’t have to fix everything — listening itself is powerful.

2. Encourage Connection

• Invite them to a walk, a coffee, or a non-pressured hangout.

• Gentle presence helps break isolation.

3. Normalise Emotional Expression

• Share that mental health challenges are human and common — strength shows in asking for help, not hiding pain.

4. Signpost to Support Services
Knowing where to point someone can make a huge difference:

• Samaritans (24/7 listening) – 116 123 (UK)

• CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) helpline – 0800 58 58 58

• Mind (mental health charity) – 0300 123 3393